


Dark Sides? More like Dork Sides!

by Anonymous



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, basically the author thinks they're funny and this work is about to prove them wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:47:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29560719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Basically my dumping ground for random stupid scenarios surrounding the Dark Sides that my brain comes up with.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Comments: 1
Kudos: 31
Collections: Anonymous





	Dark Sides? More like Dork Sides!

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, so sometimes I come up with random scenarios in my head, and I can't stop laughing at them until I write them down. Thus, this was born. 
> 
> (Note: I will keep this marked as complete, because the individual chapters have nothing to do with each other, and there is no overall storyline, so this can be read at any point, and it will seem complete (I hope that makes sense))
> 
> No warnings for this chapter, as far as I'm aware, but if I've missed anything, or I've written something with the potential to offend, let me know.

"Janny!" Remus whined.  
  
Janus chuckled from his place on the couch as he idly flipped through TV channels, trying to find a movie both himself and Remus would like.  
  
"Yes, Remus?"  
  
"We don't have any more strawberry Poptarts!" Remus emerged from the kitchen, arms crossed. Janus shook his head.  
  
"Oh dear, what a tragedy," he said, voice trembling with suppressed laughter.  
  
"Yeah, it is!" Without warning, Remus scooped Janus off the couch, carrying him under his arm, not unlike how one would carry books, or a small log.

Janus kicked frantically, trying to wiggle out of Remus' grip.  
  
"Let go of me, you moron!"  
  
"No can do, Janny!" Remus cackled, sinking out, and taking Janus with him.

"We're gonna get us those Poptarts."  
  
-  
  
"Unbelievable! How can you call yourself a Disney fan if you haven't watched Finding Nemo?"  
  
"I don't know, Princey," Virgil shrugged. "Never really appealed to me. I mean, it's literally an embodiment of everything I'm against."  
  
Roman raised an eyebrow, coming to stand in front of Virgil, hands on his hips.  
  
"How so?"  
  
"Well, it's a film about a child who doesn't listen to his father who warns him time and time again to not go near a boat," Virgil threw his hands in the air. "And what does he do? Goes and touches the boat!"  
  
"Well, yes, but-" Virgil stopped listening to whatever Roman's was saying, eyes zeroing in on two Sides rising up in the kitchen, just behind.  
  
Remus and Janus.  
  
He watched as Remus attempted to reach the top of the cabinet himself, seemingly looking for something. After finally figuring out that he couldn't do it himself (it took him far longer to come to that realisation than it should have, in Virgil's opinion), he grabbed Janus, hoisting the Side up onto his shoulders. Janus wobbled, and Virgil held his breath, hoping they wouldn't draw attention.  
  
He pursed his lips, trying desperately to smother his laughter, as Remus almost dropped Janus. The Side locked eyes with Virgil for a split second, waving hello casually, as if it was completely normal to sneak into someone else's kitchen randomly. He then proceeded to shout at Remus, but had apparently silenced the kitchen beforehand, so no sound was heard.  
  
Essentially, all Virgil could see was Janus yelling at Remus, but like a Chaplin-style silent film.  
  
And it was beyond hilarious.   
  
"-Topic? Virge, you ok? What're you laughing about?"  
  
Virgil's eyes snapped back to Roman, who was staring at him, confusion evident on his features.   
  
"You keep looking over my shoulder. Is there something back there?"

Virgil panicked, eyes flicking back to Janus, who mouthed,  
  
"Distract him!"  
  
Distract him? _How_?  
  
Virgil bit his lip in a feeble attempt to stop it quivering.  
  
"N-nothing's wrong, Princey-"  
  
"Ok, c'mon, I know you think I'm stupid, but I'm not _that_ stupid. There's something happening behind me, right?" Roman started to turn, and Virgil's hands shot out, grabbing his shoulders.  
  
"No!- I-I mean, uh, I was _really_ invested in what you were saying about Finding Nemo. I might actually watch it now," Virgil laughed nervously. "You've convinced me, Princey!"  
  
Roman raised an eyebrow.  
  
"...ok," he said, carefully, shrugging Virgil's hands off his shoulders. "I'm going to turn around now-"  
  
"No!" Without thinking, he threw his arms around Roman's shoulders, hugging tightly.  
  
He glared at Remus and Janus over the prince's shoulder, who were now watching this train wreck of an interaction, the former munching on a box of strawberry Poptarts, package and all.  
  
"Y-you know, Princey, I-I don't think I've ever told you what an _amazing_ friend you are!" Virgil exclaimed, voice saccharine, holding tighter when Roman tried to break free. "Truly, truly wonderful, I don't know what I'd do without you!"

"Go! Go!" He mouthed aggressively at Janus and Remus, who were laughing so hard tears were streaming down their faces.  
  
At one point, Remus doubled over, nearly sending Janus tumbling to the ground again. He received another severe telling off for that.  
  
Well, Virgil _thought_ it was severe. He couldn't hear any of it.  
  
"Leave!" He mouthed again, unravelling one of his arms from Roman's waist to make a dismissing motion.  
  
Luckily, the duo didn't seem to be in a mood for mischief, as Janus just grabbed several more Poptart boxes from Logan's secret stash, before they both sank out, Remus not even bothering to let Janus down from his shoulders.  
  
Virgil breathed a silent sigh of relief, before realising he was still hugging Roman. Cringing, he let go slowly, allowing Roman to step back. As soon as he had, the prince turned around, scrutinising the kitchen. When he faced Virgil again, he placed a hand on his forehead, as if he was feeling for a fever.   
  
"You feeling ok, Jack Smellington? There was nothing behind me. What were you-"  
  
"Hallcinations!" Virgil blurted, inwardly facepalming.  
  
Hallucinations? Really?

"Yeah, uh, I sometimes hallucinate random situations that involve-" Janus popped back up, now armed with a bag of popcorn, watching the exchange with interest. Virgil's eyes widened

"Ja-" _no no no no-_

"-aaaaam. Yeah, jam. Some are hilarious, some are terrifying-" _Oh gosh Virgil, shut up!_ "-you should consider yourself lucky it was only a funny one this time! The scary ones are the worst!"  
  
"Right..." Roman nodded slowly. "I going to my room now. I think you should lie down. And, uh, get the whole _hallucinations_ thing looked at."  
  
Virgil nodded so rapidly his neck hurt, plastering on a grin.  
  
"Yeah! I'll do that!" He said, far too enthusiastically, before sinking out.  
  
He rose up in his room and threw himself onto his bed. Roman was never going to look at him the same again! He had just begun devising a plan as to how to exist in the Light Side without ever showing his face in the Common Room ever again, when,  
  
"Y-you know, Princey, I-I don't think I've ever told you what an _amazing_ friend you are!"  
  
Virgil rolled over to see Janus mimicking his voice perfectly, while Remus had turned purple trying to suppress his laughter. Virgil groaned.  
  
"I better get some of those Poptarts as payment for that."  
  
Janus slowly hid the box of Poptarts in his hands behind his back, keeping his eyes locked on Virgil's.   
  
"What Poptarts?" 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed my pitiful attempt at humor
> 
> Take care <3


End file.
